We got a little glimpse of just about everyone in this episode, as the noble families all gear up for war. There are only two episodes left in the season, so we can be sure big things are about to go down.
My BROTP
In King’s Landing, everyone is concerned about Joffrey’s ability to rule and defend the city against Stannis’ impending siege. Their odds aren’t looking good, as Tyrion eloquently puts it, King’s Landing has “pig shit” in comparison to Stannis’ ships and soldiers. Cersei also tells Tyrion that she’s found “his whore”, but it turns out to be Roz and not Shae that she’s captured. Tyrion is clearly shaken up by the incident however, and rushes to Shae afterward, telling her they must be more careful. There are some choice bro-scenes between Tyrion and Varys, who is clearly impressed with Tyrion’s shrewd nature and propensity for courtly manipulation. There’s even a bit of foreshadowing, as the two began to discuss the threat of Daenerys and her dragons across the sea, and Tyrion delivers one of the best lines of the episode, reminding Varys they can only play “one game at a time.”
Meanwhile, Stannis has almost arrived at King’s Landing, and tells Ser Davos that when he reclaims the Iron Throne, he plans to make him his Hand. It’s a huge honor for someone as lowborn as Davos, of which Stannis reminds him, saying it will probably be the first time the son of a crabber has filled the position. I’m gonna be real upset if things don’t work out for Ser Davos. He’s been simply trying to get by this whole season, unfortunately caught up in an elaborate political game he has no personal interest in. I have a feeling he is going to be the one to bear the brunt of consequences from Stannis’ various missteps and Melisandre’s dark magic.
Up in the north, Theon is still in control of Winterfell, though he is arguably more hated and disrespected than ever. He is killing all the ravens leaving Winterfell and holding all the horses to keep Robb from hearing that he killed Bran and Rickon, but his sister Yara rightfully argues that it won’t be enough, and attempts to bring him back home with her. She even drops the snark for a moment and has some real talk with Theon, asking him to reconsider his plan, as she doesn’t want to see her brother die so far away from the sea. We also find that indeed, the Stark boys are not dead, but hiding in Winterfell with Osha and Hodor. It was the farmer’s sons who were killed and strung up at the gates.
Beyond the Wall, the Rangers of the Night’s Watch are dead, except for Quorin and Jon, who are captives of the Wildlings, being taken to their leader. Jon’s status as Ned’s bastard son saves his life, and Quorin tells him getting intel on the Wildlings movements would be a huge advantage, if he can do “what must be done.” Back at the Fist of the First Men, Sam and the boys uncover a bundle of obsidian spear tips, which will surely prove useful before the season is over. Unfortunately, Jon Snow remains clothed throughout these scenes.
At the Stark camp, Robb finds that Cat sent Jaime to King’s Landing with Brienne, in exchange for Arya and Sansa. In a short scene, the two banter as Jaime tries to trick Brienne into releasing him, but our favorite lady-knight is simply not having it. Robb places Cat under guard for weakening their position behind his back and continues to plan Theon’s downfall and attacks against the Lannisters. Romance also continues to blossom between Robb and Talisa, despite his betrothal to the Frey girl, and after she tells him a story about how she decided to study medicine after a slave saved her brother from drowning, they get down to business and all that eye-sex turns into actual sex. Though a lot of fans are rightfully disappointed at the lack of naked Robb compared to lengthy shots of naked Talisa. Especially since Renly was killed off after just one sex scene and we’re still not over it. Come on, HBO, be equal-opportunity-sexy and throw us a bone already (pun entirely intended.)
In Harrenhal, Arya finds that Tywin plans to march on Robb, and she wants Jaqen to kill him before he leaves. She cannot find him in time, and instead tells him to kill himself unless he helps her, Gendry, and Hot Pie escape the keep. Jaqen is miffed, but bound by his strange assassin’s honor, and agrees, telling them to simply walk out of the gates at midnight. The three do so easily, as Jaqen has killed all the guards at the gate. Thankfully, it seems one thing Arya did not inherit from her father is the need to play by the rules, as Jaqen’s snipe of “a girl has no honor” rolls right off her back, and she gives a disinterested shrug in response.
Finally, in Qarth, Ser Jorah pleads with Dany to leave on a ship he’s procured, but they will have to leave immediately, without the dragons. She refuses, and asks him to take her to the House of the Undying to retrieve them, as they are the only children she will ever have. I’m excited to see what’s about to go down here, as it almost guarantees some good old fashioned magical spectacle. Not that there won’t be adventure and excitement to be found elsewhere, because if the previews for the final two episodes are to be believed, things are about to get a whole lot bloodier.
